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How to Find “Balance” in the Midst of the Crazy

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By Rebekah Bullard

When I think of balance, I think of someone in a circus act spinning fragile plates on thin poles while also riding a unicycle. In life, we are all given lots of responsibilities to steward and it becomes easy to think it’s all on us to spin a crazy amount of things at once. We run from one plate to next in sheer panic of letting something drop. Today, I want you to permission yourself to throw the myth of “balance” out the window along with the plates and the unicycle. 

{Instead of pressuring yourself to hold it all up, choose first to lay it all down.}

Balance is an illusion because for everything there is a season.

I want you to try something. Think of your responsibilities as separate buckets, marked with a label on the front. Next, it is important to clarify which of your buckets are actually best for YOU to keep. If you find a bucket with a label that is not best for you, go ahead and lay that one to the side. 

In this season, I happen to have buckets labeled “Wife,” “Mama,” and “Ministry Leader.” When I work a long day, I know how important it is to put equity back into the “Mama” bucket. What’s interesting is it’s actually not as complicated to fill up this bucket as my mom-guilt might lead me to believe. It is as simple as going up to my daughter’s room and singing into her karaoke machine for 20 minutes, or sitting on the couch while looking into her eyes for 10 minutes to play a quick game of 20 questions. 

It is often easier for our hearts to be free from the burden of guilt when we have taken time to clarify the things that matter to us the most.

{In all things, remember to give yourself grace.}

The good news is your efforts will go farther than you think. While it is your job to monitor your most important buckets closely, it is not your job to keep them all perfectly filled to the top at the same time. 

The reason? We have a Savior who can take what we do in our natural strength, and magnify its impact in His supernatural strength. That’s why it’s often the smallest acts of love or discipline that end up meaning the most in our lives. Remove the self-inflicted pressure to be “perfect” at everything all the time. Thankfully, our buckets don’t empty out overnight. 

Our experiences build on one another and the investments we make are honored over time. Every day is a new day. 

{Last, ask for help. You don’t have to be the hero.}

Give yourself as much grace as you would a dear friend. Hopefully, there are people in your life who you allow yourself to have the freedom of authenticity when you are with them. Focus your energy on the people who fill your bucket, not the ones who drain it. It might be hard to differentiate this at first, because we all want to be accepted by everyone. It’s okay to carefully decide which people you will allow into the messiest parts of who you are. 

Here’s the real truth— If your friends can handle your emotionally messy days, they can also handle your messy house. Let people in and don’t worry about the sheen of seeming perfect. What’s on the surface will always fade, but your ability to be vulnerable will outlast it all. This is how we show our kids and our friends what’s most important, and that it’s okay to not have it all together all the time.

{Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. – Romans 12:2}

This week, renew your mind by throwing off the pressure and perfection of balance. 

{Your circumstances may not change, but your perspective CAN change.}

How would your life change today if you labeled your important buckets, kept your heart focused on grace and opened your heart to rely on true community in a way like never before?

Copy of WHAT I'M LEARNING ABOUT SINGLENESSRebekah loves to call Nashville “home,” but she is a Texas girl to the core and firmly believes that there is not much chips and salsa can’t fix. Rebekah spends her time as a full-time working mama leading teams and partnering with families in ministry, while also walking beside her dreamer husband to the ends of the Earth. She is passionate about seeing people step into the confidence of all that God has calling them to be and creating places of community where people can say, “Me too.” Rebekah has been married to Chris, her college sweetheart, for 10 years. They have one beautiful daughter, Gracie Ann. She serves as the Kids Pastor at Cross Point Church in Nashville and writes about looking for hope in the unlikely places at

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