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Blossoming In Community: How to Find a Mentor

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When you grow up in a church of about sixty people, you really get to know each other well. I loved that about my small church—they were my family. But it also meant that my youth group wasn’t huge.

As a high schooler, you don’t want to embrace the friendships that can be made from older ladies. It’s not the “cool” thing to do. Hanging out with your super awesome Granna is one thing (and boy, does my Granna rock). Voluntarily spending your time with other old ladies is another.

Anyways, to grow closer to God and the relationship He had to offer me, I had to step out of my high school comfort zone and attend Bible studies that only the older women participated in.

I remember walking into my first one. We were planning to study the book of Esther, and I sat in my car outside of the fellowship hall watching each lady trickle into the meeting space. If you wait and walk in a few minutes late, you won’t even have to converse with them, I thought to myself. It was an absolutely perfect plan to dodge all conversations.

Until it wasn’t. I should’ve known that a group of twenty women would not have started on time. Nevertheless, I walked in, looked awkwardly for a place to sit, and realized immediately that I was more than welcome in this group.

Many women had an empty seat beside them and offered it to me. It was almost like I was being fought over! Quickly, I settled in, tried not to make a scene, and grabbed a couple snacks. After an hour of Bible study, I realized those women were my people. Regardless of age.

Actually, I think it’s the age difference that made the friendships even sweeter. Which brings me to the topic of mentors and how important they are!

To me, a mentor is a friend. An older friend, but a friend. She’s a woman (if you’re a woman, because, y’all, there are just some things a woman will understand that a man can’t) that shares the same interests as you and wants to see you grow.

Those are my very few requirements to finding a mentor. I want someone that is older than I am because the sharing of wisdom across generations is a beautiful concept. I also want someone that shares some similar interests because we can grow towards Christ in those things.

Most importantly, when finding a mentor, it’s necessary for both people to pray over the relationship in your life. Sometimes, I have stumbled upon mentors. We’ve been friends for years and it’s not until I’m needing life advice, pick up the phone to give my friend a call, and realize that I consider her a mentor.

Other times, the mentor/mentee relationship is intentional. I remember meeting and spending time with my friend, Erin, and really needing someone to share my life with. Someone who could meet weekly, text regularly, pray constantly, and bounce ideas off of each other. Asking Erin if she could be my mentor was one of the best decisions I’ve made.

Friends, I stress the importance of mentors in our lives. I whole-heartedly believe that we were called to do life together. A one-on-one mentor/mentee relationship that is intentional benefits both women. There is growing through scripture and study, laughing, and sharing the highs and lows of life.

There’s nothing quite like it. Whether you have one mentor, or three, you have friends. You have God-given and God-seeking women speaking truth and wisdom you wouldn’t believe.

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