We all come to points in our becoming stories where we find ourselves at a crossroads—where we must decide to move forward, to take the step, to make the leap, becoming who God made us to be… or not.
I found myself here last summer. In the months leading up to my crossroads decision, I made a major career move, moved across the country, and launched a new business, navigating life as a #GirlBoss. But I wasn’t loving it. My business was doing great… it was a success just a few months in… but I didn’t feel like it was a right fit… it wasn’t who I was designed to be. I began to spiral into depression and slowly began believing the lie I don’t know who I am… I remember having a conversation with my Dad, sharing my doubts, frustrations, and uncertainty on who I was and who I was becoming. Without hesitating, he shared one of the most profound, life changing statements on my becoming journey. Looking me straight in the eyes, my Dad challenged me: “Emily, you know who you want to be. You just have to choose to be her.”
You know who you want to be.
You just have to choose to be her.
This couldn’t have been more true then and now. Deep down, each of us knows who we want to be. Far too often, we allow other voices, circumstances, expectations, challenges, and life dictate who we are, what we should do, who we should be, and who we should become. But here’s the thing—no one else—no circumstance or person—has the power to be you. Only you have the power to choose to be who God made you to be. You can choose to be who everyone else tells you to be, or you can choose to be who you know you want to be… who God made you to be… all along.
I love the scene in the movie Wonder Woman when Diana sees the challenge and opportunity before her in “No Man’s Land”. Seeing her frustration and determination to cross the land no man has dared to cross, Steve, her friend and closest companion on the journey, discourages her from the mission—even stating that’s not what they came to do. Diana found herself at her own crossroads. Would she lean into what those around her were telling her to do, to be? Or would she choose to be her?
What’s the “No Man’s Land” in front of you? As I sat in my living room talking with my Dad last summer, my “No Man’s Land” looked like shutting down the business I started and stepping into a full time role on a church team I love. That was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. Looking back through each of the chapters in my becoming story, I never regret the moments I stepped out, trusting God, choosing to be me.
Maybe your “No Man’s Land” looks like making a phone call and asking someone you’ve hurt for forgiveness; maybe it’s stepping out of an unhealthy relationship; perhaps it’s enrolling in classes at your local university and pursuing the next level of your education; maybe it looks like sending your resume and applying for that job; perhaps it means having that doctor’s exam you’ve been putting off because you’re nervous about what the results may be; maybe it’s renewing your membership at the gym, setting your alarm clock earlier and exercising; perhaps it’s initiating new friendships and inviting people to dinner; maybe it’s writing a book, painting that masterpiece, or designing that piece of art you’ve always dreamt of; perhaps it means going through the steps to become a foster parent; maybe it looks like going on a missions trip; maybe it looks like serving at your local church; perhaps it looks like inviting that friend to have coffee and telling her about Jesus…
What’s the thing that wakes you up in the middle of the night? What makes you cry? What breaks your heart and brings you the most joy? Friend, that’s your THING, that’s your WHY, that’s the indicator of the “No Man’s Land” you must cross. My primary “why’s” have been in my heart since I was a little girl—writing, empowering women, and investing my life in ministry. This was the “No Man’s Land” I needed to cross last summer… I closed the chapter of a business endeavor that wasn’t made for me and stepped back into vocational ministry in a local church and continued to partner with women through BecomingMe.TV. I chose to be her and stepped out.
You have this power too. How can you fight to become who God made you to be? Choose to be her. Choose to be her right now, again in 5 minutes, later today, tomorrow, the day after, and the day after that… every minute you choose to be her, you’re fighting to become who God made you to be. And friend, that’s the mark of a warrior on this grand becoming journey. Don’t give up. Don’t quit. I’m right here fighting with you. You can do this. You can choose to be her. Will you?