Flirting– (flirt-ing) to make playfully romantic or sexual overtures; to deal superficially with; toss or flip suddenly; to move quickly.
Ecclesiastes 10:12-13– “Words from a wise [woman’s] mouth are gracious, but a fool is consumed by [her] own lips. At the beginning [her] words are folly; at the end they are wicked madness.”
To flirt or not to flirt, that is the question. Hmmmm…..and a very good question at that! Seriously, is flirting just all fun and games or can really people get hurt in the process? According to Mr. Webster and King Jesus, the answer to our second question (on whether people get hurt) is absolutely! The dictionary says that flirting is something that you do “superficially” which means “shallow.” OK, so flirting with guys is “shallow.” I have honestly never thought of it that way before! The Bible even backs that philosophy up too! Read Ecclesiastes 10:12-13 again. OK, did you really read it? It says that a foolish woman is “consumed with her own lips” and is viewed as “wicked madness.” So this whole flirting thing is actually pretty serious!
So, we know that flirting is a negative thing, but what exactly is flirting and how do we as girls do it?
- We flirt by acting seductively “just for fun,” playing with a guy’s mind, playing up a guy’s ego excessively, touching guys in inappropriate ways (ie. massages, full-body hugs, etc.), and spending excessive amounts of time alone with a single guy having very serious conversations (please note that while it is a good thing to have great conversations with guys, serious conversations when alone allow you and the guy you are talking with to bond in a very intimate way….these serious talks should be left for you and your future husband).
- So, and example of all of this would be you walk into youth group and you catch sight of this new guy that you have never seen before and let me tell you, he is fine! Well, you maneuver your way over to him and start a conversation (with very wrong intentions I might add–this conversation is not to make him feel comfortable in a new youth group!) in which you ask if he has a girlfriend. He says no and you mention that you are single too (playing with his minds here!). Then you sit down for youth group and you just happen to bump shoulders with him and you chair just happens to move a couple inches closer to his. Then after youth group you tell him that he is such an amazing guy and that he has the bluest eyes you have ever seen! I think this guy is going to leave thinking that he landed the jackpot of all jackpots in girls, but you were just doing all of this for “fun” to see if you could land a guy like him. You never really intended to date him in the first place. Ouch, see what I mean.
But, what if you really do like a guy? How do you let him know that! First of all, it is easy to see a hot guy and be like “wow, I am so in love!” But checking out his character is a whole other story! How does this guy treat other girls? How does he treat his mom? We will be talking more about character traits later, so hang on. But make sure that you like a guy for the right reasons. You can let him know you like him in very pure motives. How do you do that?
- Your behaviour and words are not suggestive or seductive.
- You would not be embarrassed in how you are behaving if your parents walked into the room.
OK, so we have discovered that flirting over-all is a shallow, hurtful, and temporary thing that girls do “for fun,” but ends up not being so fun! Please think before you play around with a guy’s emotions. And be careful when guys are flirting with you. You are too precious to fall for anything less than God’s perfect plan for your life!
Up next……Modesty–Isn’t that Like From the Middle Ages??